Poems

Poems that i wrote:

For That High

Your eyes set in a glaze
you wanted that high
your drifting into a haze
i finish crying with a sigh
at what ive let us become
bowing down to the buzz
paying money to get some
time goes by in a fuzz
i cant look
what have you done
cant you see
is this still fun?
You have ruined me
i sit sobbing at who i am
i was weak like a lamb
you took me in
who would've known
that you'd convince me to sin
so there goes my life blown
so agan i sigh
because i ruined my life
all for that high

Float Away

you dont even know me
but your words sting me like a bee
how can you wish me death?
how can you wish me to never take another breath?
what pain did i inflict to you?
is it because i dont have the latest shoes?
or because i dont listen to pop too?
How did i ask for this pain?
i am quiet, but barely sane.
No words leave my mouth
but you act like i cussed you out
your messages you send
I hope to not wake up the next day
when will you let my broken heart mend?
Or will you let it just let my reamains float away

 Hey guys sorry I haven't posted lately, I was grounded -_- .
           Anyway, on a better(ish) notice I may be going to a concert somewhere in April to see Halestorm and a few other bands XD. I also may go to a My Chem. concert around my birthday, I'm so excited i can barely breathe. On another notice I just wanted to talk about a pet peve of mine that people have been doing repeativly.

"Woah! What is that?"
"Why did you do that?"
"I heard you (insert stupid untrue rumor here)"
"Are you and Bob/Bobett dating?"
 Etc.
Nosey people are so fucking annoying. Granted, I am nosey to my friends (A.K.A. the people i love, so if im all in your buisness i love you) but you don't see me confronting every rummor that came from the precious pink lips of some bored A-Lister. Anyway, I have found my favorite come back;

"Woah! What is that?"
 "A giraff."
*person walks away slowly*

"Why did you do that?"
"Oh hi! I found your nose again! It was in my buisness!"
 *Person sneers and walks away*

"I heard you (insert stupid untrue rumor here)"
"Really? I (insert stupid untrue rumor here)? I never knew i did! thanks for telling me!"
 *Person gives me "that look" and walks away*

"Are you and Bob/Bobett dating?"
"Oh yeah, totally! He/She's so sexy! Mmmm...."
*Person makes discusted face and walks away*


                 Works every time (:

                                               Your the Mirror to my Mayhem,
                                                  Mirror Mayhem

...Because we own the options

 The sad thing about this world is that more of us are mistakes then not. Some people plan babies but for the most part we stopped someones life when we popped in their belly. The worst part is people who do plan, many van never have babies and us who can couldn't care less or we act like its the end of the world..

 Don't your remember when instead sex just being an activity it was"making love"? We have let sex become an object that means less than 5$. You can pay for it on the streets, you can go to a club and easily pick up a girl, you can rush your girlfriend, but that's the saddest part, that we own the options.




                                                                  your the bed to my head,
                                                                     -Mirror Mayhem-

....Killjoys Never Die.....

Okay, Okay, now I'm over doing it for one day but its my fucking blog goddammit!

 My poem

 Killjoys Never Die

This place is dark as far as the eye can see
Is this what wonderland is supposed to be?
I'm walking down this busy street
but no one sees me 
i am alone in a crowded place 
i still remember your face
we were just stuck in a haze.
This is not just a faze
reality says hello
and shes turned cold as snow
this fight lasts an life time
but the devil wants your sole to buy
run with your hopes 
avoid the swing of a rope
clutch your dreams
even if there is nothing to hold on to it seems 
lies they'll tell
your fear they can smell
we will live
our hopes alive
runaway
because killjoys never die.

--By: Mirror Mayhem (Me)

                                             You're the Chemical to My Romance,
                                                       -Mirror Mayhem-

Just Sleep

Okay two posts in one day, oh well.

You will meet people that want to kill your hopes and dreams. They will want to ruin your life for nothing. They will torture you. They will push you to the end of the cliff and they'll watch you fall. When the cops ask, you were their "friend", your were "anti-social" they say they "don't know what happened". They will be the ones that said "RIP Amanda Todd" or "Why would you ever do that to someone" They are the first to talk about how wrong bulling is. Strange how they are the opposite. So when you find yourself hollow inside, when your brain feels clogged and there's no time at all. When you feel high, or you cant remember what you do, when you feel numb and your chest is tight. When it's hard to breath and you never want to eat. Congratulate them, because they have won. They wanted to make you feel like the sick bastard you are.....but all sicknesses get better, and here is where they fail because instead of ruining your life they have ruined a time period. Because no one can dictate the way your entire life will go. So quit running. They can't ruin you forever, wounds heal and scars fade. If they think they can steal our dreams that easy, they're wrong, because "the hardest part is forgetting your dreams"

     Let them be horrible because eventually everything catches up. Just Sleep.

                                                Your the story behind my music,

                                                           -Mirror Mayhem-

...Because Nothing Is Free

 Sorry about how shitty my other post was. On today's notice;
   Today i couldn't help but think that MCR is going to break up more sooner than later. That is a very scary thought. I want to see them in concert! But Gerard would be 39 or 40 and i hope he doesn't get the oldies and not play anymore. I love them so much, but we have to save ourselves after them. They are here to make us stronger and show us the light at the end of the tunnel, they have guided us so far but one day we'll have to get off our ass and take the rest of the walk ourselves, because nothing is free. It will be hard but our mentality was trained by the best music. So even in the darkest night, we burn bright.

   


                                      Your the smoke to my gun,
                                             -Mirror Mayhem-

Warm Bodies

   So that new movie Warm Bodies is like screaming my name. I love zombies and this movie seems                      a-fucking-mazing. To me its kind o about how disconnected we are, how our lives surround technology. I have no actual idea though because i haven't seen it yet. Anyway I'm not really inspired today because I'm so tired. 

Shine on you crazy diamonds

                                          Your the adrenaline to my rush,

                                                   -Mirror Mayhem- 

Update Time!

UPDATE TIME!

  

  The girl that i have mentioned who i sit next to in 1st and 7th, for now on I'm calling her Cherry.

  I have a twitter account, follow me @MirrorMayham and tell me you followed me from here.

  

  I am failing math.... :C

   My depression deepens.

 

    For every update i promise to tell 6  facts about yours truly 

FACT TIME:

  1. I have a bipolar stomach, i am hungry, but then I'm not. 

  2. I am super bad at making decisions

  3. I fucking despise showers 

  4. I love when people pet my hair

  5. I LOVE fingerless gloves

  6. Im wise far beyond my years and am the "advise giver person"

  ***BONUS***

    I am seriously bad at being romantic and relationships(two words, Trust. Issues.

IF YOU HAVE BEEN CALLED;

FAGGOT

BITCH

SLUT

WHORE

LESBIAN

GOTH

EMO

CUNT

OR ANYTHING ELSE AS OFFENSIVE

 Join the goddamned club. Your not as fucked up as you think, because I'm over here with my arms open and smile wide, my 4"8 self cracking cheesy jokes to make you feel better. 

Email me okay? Seriously. I am here for anyone and everyone. I don't care what you have done, because i will not judge you.

 rainbowismypoptart@gmail.com

 

                                  CARRY ON YOU SICK, PSYCHOPATHIC FUCKERS!

                                                   Your the heart to my ache,

                                                      -Mirror Mayhem-

   

The Light Behind Your Eyes

"And if I could be with you tonight, i would sing you to sleep, never let them see the light behind your eyes..I failed and lost this fight, never fade in the dark, just remember you will always burn as bright"
     
                     If I could breathe in your soothing smell, lay next to your warm body.
              If I could laugh with you at the silliest things
                                    If I could laugh and cuss at you when you tickel me
                            If I could skateboard with you or learn knew things from you
                                     If i could just say hello
                               But you eft a long time ago in the winter night
                                       you left me here in the cold
                                                 Maybe thats why my heart froze
                                           If i could only see you...
                            I'd get up to get you things, even if i was lazy
                                    I'd never argue with you
                                      Tell you how amazing you are
                         but sadly instead i look at you from a far


                              Your the mindless to my self induldgence,
                                  -Mirror Mayhem-
                                           

Night Terrors

 Anyone who gets over 4 hours of sleep is a lucky bastard. Every night I either can not sleep, or choose not to. Why choose not to sleep? Oh you know I only have these completely horrifying dreams..Some examples maybe?

 Nightmare#1:
 I'm on stage with my band, we are in front of some major label companies. This was our make or brake chance. Its going soo damn well. The intro is kick ass and finally its my part. I go to sing but I cant. No words come out, as if I'd been put on mute. Not only did my only dream, my only hope get ripped to shreds right there infront of me, but so did my whole bands. I never could sing again and killed myself because i couldn't bare with the depression.

 Nightmare#2:
My music career has started. My band has came out with there first album and is doing our first concert of the album. Everything is spot on. We but every bit of emotion into it. The guitar solo is fantastic and you can hear my heart in my voice. I look down and who is in the first row looking at me? The four men who saved my life and inspired my art and music, Gerard, Mikey, Ray, Frank, and Bob. We end our last song and turns out all four of them had backstage passes. I smile huge at all of them and just as im about to tell them how much they have inspired my Gerard looks at me and frowns saying, "Your vocals were so empty, so dead. No feeling, absolutely emotionless. I feel bad because the rest of the band did good." and then Frank goes "You pretty much ruined it, your just a hormonal fangirl"

Nightmare#3:
 People i love die in front of me. They get their finger nails pulled out or hair plucked out, and im forced to watch.

 There are more and worse dreams, but those are more private. I hate this. I wrote a poem about it:

                                                       Night terrors in my dreams
                                                           ill never sleep it seems
                                                           my dreams are slashed
                                                              my hopes, bashed
                                                    and in the nothing-ness of the night
                                                           i am wishing for the light
                                                              sleeping pills useless
                                                                against the ruthless
                                                                     Night terrors

       
                                   You are the heart to my beat,
                                          -Music Mayhem-

Nightmares

I'm so scared that eventually, even though I've tried, i don't end up making music. I become another face in the crowd. My lyrics never help anyone. I have nightmares about it. The thought of not fulfilling the Passion scares the shit out of me. Music means so much to me. Every time i sing its like i move to this alternate universe where only me and my music exist. Luck is obviously not on my side so I'm just going to have to show everyone why the band is worth listening to. The thought makes me sick.





                                              your the coffee to my morning,
                                                    -Mirror Mayhem-

Tongue Language

 So I'm confused and angry. I feel so fucking horrible. I was so upset last night, i had a razor to my wrist and then i saw my stupid butterfly on my wrist(the butterfly promise where you draw a butterfly and name it after someone you love and if you cut you kill that person,its all about the thought.) So i rubbed the ink off and hacked at my arm. I'm so so mad at myself. It had been months sense i cut myself. It will be so damn hard to keep the razor away from my arm. Ill just think of Gerard Ways awesome hair, Franks quirky smile, Mikeys fun shirts and awesome glasses, and Rays amazing ass hair (and killer guitar skills) maybe ill think of my buddy,the one i talked about in the previous blog, we have 1st and 7th period together, and we have this weird thing we do where we flap our tongues around and act like we understand each other, almost as if its a language. Wish me luck you sick fuckers.



                                                Your the butterfly to my promise,
                                                           -Mirror Mayhem-

The Light To My Moon

I don't like posting more than once in a day, but I'm breaking my own rules which sadly i will probably do a lot.

 ---So i guess you could say i had a break down. I don't know honestly. I've just fallen so deep into this depression i can barely see. I loose my appetite and my body goes numb. A lot of people don't understand why i am so depressed, that goes to show that a lot of people don't know me. Lets start on my sister. Damn, is she ever gorgeous, seriously, shes stunning! She also used to be my idol until something horrible happened to me, something that took my innocents that had already been stripped thin, and threw it in the garbage. So i didn't see anyone in my family for a good 8 months, and i changed and she didn't and now all we do is argue. I slowly feel my pulsing headache right now. I'm so sick, so numb, so angry, so sad, depressed, confused, suicidal, i feel so insane. My life has turned to insanity. With my grades in the toilet and my mum who i think is bipolar, my gran who is insanely religious and fights me about everything, or my school full of assholes and ignorant pricks. There are a few people there that i actually like and trust. This one girl who i have in my 1 and 7th period, who i sit right next to in both classes. I like her a lot. She has short hair and is actually very pretty. There is a girl with dark long hair and she is tall and always talks about this boy. But even in a crowd full of people i have never felt so alone. My nights are haunting. I am an insomniac and am never able to sleep, but when i do nightmares flood me terrorizing me to no end, I want to end it, i try to stay strong but everyone and everything has a breaking point, and I'm so tired of pretending to not care, pretending to be strong.


                                         Your light to my moon,
                                             -Mirror Mayhem-

Poisoned strawberries and a little LeATHERMOUTH

 If i'm drawing, i would appreciate it if you BACK THE FUCK OFF until i'm done. I don't want your annoying self looking over my shoulder..damn. Its also annoying when you ask what it is or say its bad, who said i was done? The people these days are just annoying...


   Especially when they aren't picking up there crumbs out of the goddamn toaster. XD

So i'm sitting around eating strawberries and listening to LeATHERMOUTH when i stop and think, "is this music crap?" then i laughed and knew i was making the right choice. Must have been something in those strawberries....
  Everyone's a suspect..


       Your the Party to my Poison,
          -Mirror Mayhem-

Hello fellow sinners and dust rats, welcome to the dark side

Well i guess i created this simply to vent on my own ideas and thoughts. Maybe hoping that one day someone else's eyes will view my words. I am Mirror Mayhem I like black and purple, i like reading and many bands like:
My Chemical Romance
Mayday Parade
Good Charlotte
Greenday
Pencey Prep
The Used
LeATHERMOUTH
Black Sabbath
Pink Floyd
etc.
 I write books, songs an poetry and dream that one day ill be able to get myself out of the shit hole place i live in and sing with my band professionally, that way i may be able to save a life too. Also speaking that music is my anti-depressant. 
            
                                                 With love,
                                              Mirror Mayhem